BLASSREITER

This show hit all the right buttons: blatant CGI sequences, hackneyed dialogue, zero plot, and character designs that scream "merchandising tie-in." It also discovered the secret "smash through the storyline quick before someone realizes there's no logic to it" switch and tweaked the emergency "explosions that are somehow NOT COOL" dial up to 11. Having successfully activated its own self-destruct sequence, the show suffers a catastrophic structural implosion at about the five minute mark and collapses into a white hole, which is like a black hole except instead of sucking in crap it spits it out.

It would have been so much better if it'd been "Excitebike: the Anime," but noooo, they had to go with a generic zombie plot. I mean, the first few moments probably reflect the whole storywriting process: "Naked chick! WHOOOOOAAA! Zombie! WOAAAAH! Motorbike! WOAAAAH!" If you're going to go for over-the-top action, at least acknowledge it by not taking yourself seriously, guys. (See: Najica Boob Tactics.)

It also featured 30 minutes of blatantly obvious CGI, which I despise. The fact that the male lead reminds me of Heat Guy "DEAR GOD HOW DID THIS SHOW LAST 40 EPISODES AARRGH!" J doesn't help, nor does the fact that he gets his powers from illicit pharmaceuticals and apparently suffers no ill effect.

Fetch my flamethrower; there's burning to do.

but but but... it has motorcycles... and explosions. One guy has a sword even! :jig:

Exactly! It has motorcycles, swords, and missiles and uses them so badly they become UNCOOL! Researchers should immediately seize all copies of this show and study them, for the directors have discovered an amazingly efficient protonic reversal device that, properly harnessed, could supply us with limitless quantities of antimatter! This show is not anime; it is our renewable energy future, and should not be wasted on daytime television broadcasts.

Besides, motorcycles aren't cool if everyone uses them. It's gotta be one guy, who, like, can drive off walls or do ninja tricks and stuff. Besides, motorbikes with missiles reminds me of M.A.S.K.

True that.

wow...yeah - I don't think there's really much else left to say. Lack of plot and sheer slaughterage of things that should be awesome set aside... nothing about this show intrigued me or made me even want to try and put up with everything the show lacks, not to mention the fact that the overuse of CG made the animation feel choppy and really turned me off.